Never Too Early to Start a Bucket List...

Of course my thoughts about what my own bucket list would be began back when I watched the movie "The Bucket List."  You'd think my accident and my many brushes with The Grim Reaper would prompt me to begin one a long time ago; but, no.  Perhaps it was because writing down everything I'd like to do challenged the self-defeating belief I had about myself that there were somethings that I probably would never do again.  As this year started, I began to think of things that would challenge me not only physically, but psychologically as well.  In 2010, when I started this blog, the only thing on my list was to write and get published. I was recovering from a freak-accident femur fracture that left me psychologically scarred for a long time, well, until very recently.

After Anastasia's arrival, I began to once again entertain the thought of 100% independence and as she grows as fast as the speed of light (it seems), I realize that my heart cries aloud to participate in every activity with her. So, my bucket list started out as a TO DO list in order to reclaim my independent life so that I could share it all with my daughter. Then, slowly, this TO DO list began to grow and it is no longer comprised of short term goals, but long term goals too.  As someone who starts projects and struggles to finish them, this list has made the difference in my everyday living. I only do those things that will get me closer to either my short term or long term goals. Everything else.. well,  it's not that important right now.

Looking at my goals and things that I strive to accomplish on paper inspires me to keep on moving forward. Towards last year's end, I read a quote that said "People spend more time planning their vacations than planning their lives." I think this was the sentence that brought that awareness to my life. I wanted to live my life with purpose again. No more feeling disempowered by self-limiting beliefs that were birthed out of fear.  Although I still feel fear, I now challenge it. It has become a little game in my head. I treat my anxieties as opportunities to rise above my preconceived notion about myself and other people sometimes. So far, this approach has worked great and the possibilities are endless.

In the future, perhaps, I will include the bucket list itself as part of the blog. For now, I rather keep it to myself. Once I feel the time is right, I will post all the things that make up the list and future ones that I will eventually think of as time progresses.

Beautiful Poem

Yesterday, I was surprised not only by a beautiful poem, but by 2 books in the mail. I knew I hadn't purchased any books, and as soon as I opened the boxes and saw the titles I knew who had sent them. My beautiful friend, Sylwia.

I wanted to repost the poem she sent me, because it is simply amazing.

Invitation by Oriah    

 

It doesn’t interest me

what you do for a living.

I want to know

what you ache for

and if you dare to dream

of meeting your heart’s longing.

 

It doesn’t interest me

how old you are.

I want to know

if you will risk

looking like a fool

for love

for your dream

for the adventure of being alive.

 

 

It doesn’t interest me

what planets are

squaring your moon...

I want to know

if you have touched

the centre of your own sorrow

if you have been opened

by life’s betrayals

or have become shrivelled and closed

from fear of further pain.

 

 

I want to know

if you can sit with pain

mine or your own

without moving to hide it

or fade it

or fix it.

 

 

I want to know

if you can be with joy

mine or your own

if you can dance with wildness

and let the ecstasy fill you

to the tips of your fingers and toes

without cautioning us

to be careful

to be realistic

to remember the limitations

of being human.

 

 

It doesn’t interest me

if the story you are telling me

is true.

I want to know if you can

disappoint another

to be true to yourself.

If you can bear

the accusation of betrayal

and not betray your own soul.

If you can be faithless

and therefore trustworthy.

 

 

I want to know if you can see Beauty

even when it is not pretty

every day.

And if you can source your own life

from its presence.

 

 

I want to know

if you can live with failure

yours and mine

and still stand at the edge of the lake

and shout to the silver of the full moon,

“Yes.”

 

 

It doesn’t interest me

to know where you live

or how much money you have.

I want to know if you can get up

after the night of grief and despair

weary and bruised to the bone

and do what needs to be done

to feed the children.

 

 

It doesn’t interest me

who you know

or how you came to be here.

I want to know if you will stand

in the centre of the fire

with me

and not shrink back.

 

 

It doesn’t interest me

where or what or with whom

you have studied.

I want to know

what sustains you

from the inside

when all else falls away.

 

 

I want to know

if you can be alone

with yourself

and if you truly like

the company you keep

in the empty moments.

 

Thank you my friend. This poem touched me deeply.

On My Yellow Brick Road...

I've found there is a very fine line between what you believe it is your duty, what you believe is your inspiration and what you believe is your true mission.  I guess it all started out when I graduated high school and was given the enormous responsibility of choosing a major in college.  This task was so huge for me, so overwhelming that I avoided it for as long as I could.  During my first two years, I stuck to the tried and true and followed my mathematically inclined left brained and received an A.A. in Accounting.  When I moved on to a state university, I changed my major to Economics, since I found Accounting to technical with not a lot of room for creativity.  Economics on the other hand was a total different language.  Its theoretical approach and three page-long problems defied my views of what I thought mathematics were and challenged me to go on to a new level of thinking.  Daily grind and preoccupations, however, stirred me away from finishing that degree and shortly after I joined the Police Academy.

Today, over a decade since I left the "college" world and didn't find a very convincing reason to go back – because every time I went back to finish my degree, I felt uninspired, learning something that I knew was of no relevance to the person I had become and questioned every second how whatever it was that I was learning would benefit me 10 years down the road, not only professionally but personally as well.  I sought after a type of education that was more encompassing of what life entailed.  I searched for a teacher who could talk to me in terms of life experiences, life lessons, life quests and gave me answers for questions that had mulled inside of me since my meager age of seven.

I have been incredibly blessed to have found this teacher, "university", and many students who were in the same path as me.  In search of something deeper, more meaningful, lessons that can be passed on to other people, and our children included.  Answers that satiate the hunger of our souls' knowledge and come from dependable sources with no second agendas. No egotistical intentions and no save-face type of teachings.

My true dilemma now with what I have learned is that I believed I was learning something that I could practice with others and help them as well.  As I have slowly and painfully discovered is that my sensitivity of working with others cause me to feel too vested in the outcome of the session.  I become too energetically connected with the client and lose my own "essence" during the process. Last week, as I worked with a couple of clients, I did great with some and not so great with others.  This is by no means the clients' fault, for I feel extremely grateful to them and to myself for having the courage to dive right into the work and discover what it was to work with people and see the transformation hands on.  It has been an incredible learning experience.  I have an utter respect for the work I was taught and believe it deserves to be delivered to the clients by people who resonate working one on one with others.  I, for now, still do not feel at that level.  That I felt was my duty.

My inspiration lies in writing and raising my daughter.  And it's heavily intertwined with my mission in life. Working one on one with a few people deepened the awareness inside of me that writing is undoubtedly my bread and water, just as much as Anastasia's voice in the morning and her beautiful laughter. Writing lifts my soul from the darkest of depths.  It relieves my my heart from self-imposed obligations.  Writing renews my energy, revitalizes my body and refreshes my mind. Anastasia on the other hand is the oxygen to my lungs and the inspiration for me to keep living the life of my dreams so that she can mirror herself in my own actions.  The days I don't feel like getting up from bed, I remember her and she gives me the jump-start I need to get up, and get myself together and organize my vision for the future.  More and more that vision has become clearer and the paths have opened up.  It's an unmistakable entanglement what these two things inspire me to accomplish within my own life and in turn in the life of the thousands who are touched by what I write and share.

Finally, throughout this self discovery path of mine, I have discovered that my mission is nothing else but to serve others while I'm here.  Serve them the best way I know how.  Telling stories.  I believe my yellow big road has just began.  I certainly feel like Dorothy as she carried Toto in her little basket, not yet knowing she would meet the Scarecrow, The Tin Man, The Lion, and finally The Wizard.  I'm on my way.  And, as I meet the most inspiring, incredible people on my path, I have yet to figure out which one is the scarecrow, tin man, lion and the wizard.  Perhaps, many will play the role of one, or one will play the role of many. The mission is clear.  And, what is most enticing is the journey I have embarked on. What I had set out as an expected plan of action has revealed to me early on that that is not the way things are meant to go for me.  I'm thankful to have been as open minded about the change of course and ready for it.  Maybe deep inside, I knew all along what the turnout would be.  The journey continues however and where it will stop, it doesn't concern me.  I just focus on never stopping.

Integrating All Of You in Two Phrases - Thank You and I Love You

As my soul evolves and my consciousness expands, I am learning that I have yet to learn so much, and at the same time, a fire inside of me burns with more intensity on this quest of knowledge, authenticity and wholeness.  

It is no coincidence that once I set out to expand, learn and love with total intention and desire I came across Dr. John F. Demartini and his teachings.  Having considered myself a perpetual student of life, the first time I heard him speak, I heard someone speaking my language.  I felt as if I had found the teacher I had been looking for since I was seven years old.  To prepare me for this meeting, teachings and paradigm shift, the Universe brought forth to me other loving lessons which helped me integrate all that was being taught with a bit of a practical glimpse.  As Dr. Demartini expresses "things are on the way not in the way," previous events in my life and an unconventional outlook of those events allowed me to "get" him and devour every word he had to teach.  

I have expressed in two previous blogs how profound my experiences were in his signature program The Breakthrough Experience.  I participated twice and recently just finished the Demartini Method Training Program, which makes me now a Trained Demartini Method Facilitator.  The incredible insights, connections and awareness that have begun since my first Breakthrough Experience are immeasurable.  The truth is.. "To speak is to lie."  (As I have heard so many times during the training.) There are no words that do justice to what the whole experience is about.  It literally is a BREAKTHROUGH.  

On my plane ride back, I read over materials, took notes, used the Demartini Method, and listened to Dr. Demartini's CDs.  As I was landing, I closed my eyes, centered myself and asked my soul to guide me in writing a blog about what the experience was about.  What I have heard repeatedly as loud as I heard it the first time from Dr. Denise Nadler, Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator and Trainer, is THANK YOU & I LOVE YOU.

I am grateful for the experience because it deepened the certainty inside myself to serve others.  I am grateful to have learned to use a tool that can assist others to see their own magnificence by owning all parts of themselves, the ones we perceive as "good" and the ones we perceive as "bad."  I am grateful for the people that have represented support and challenge in my journey and continue to do so, for they are both forms of love manifesting itself to help me own all that I truly am.  A huge thank you to all the attendees in that room, because I felt I was amongst family - an Earthly family.  I am specially grateful to Dr. Denise Nadler who represented a big challenge to me and in doing so, this perception of her pushed me harder to want to master the Demartini Method, and to Dr. Demartini for sharing this wisdom and desiring for us to learn it and spread it to others.  To my mom, brother, sister, Josie, Deise and my daughter a heartfelt thank you for facilitating my going to the training and learning new ways to master my life and expand my soul.  And lastly but not least, I am grateful to myself for trusting the inspiring voice inside of me and following this inspiration with an open heart.  

Thank you and I love you are the only true ways to manifest what I feel inside.  

Letter From God

I received this email and needed to post it instead of forwarding it only to a few friends.. Beautiful!!

Our 14-year-old dog Abbey died last month. The day after she passed away my 4-year-old daughter Meredith was crying and talking about how much she missed Abbey. She asked if we could write a letter to God so that when Abbey got to heaven, God would recognize her. I told her that I thought we could so, and she dictated these words:

Dear God, 
Will you please take care of my dog? She died yesterday and is with you in heaven. I miss her very much. I am happy that you let me have her as my dog even though she got sick.
I hope you will play with her. She likes to swim and play with balls. I am sending a picture of her so when you see her you will know that she is my dog. I really miss her. 
Love, Meredith 

We put the letter in an envelope with a picture of Abbey and Meredith and addressed it to God/Heaven. We put our return address on it. Then Meredith pasted several stamps on the front of the envelope because she said it would take lots of stamps to get the letter all the way to heaven. That afternoon she dropped it into the letter box at the post office. A few days later, she asked if God had gotten the letter yet. I told her that I thought He had.

Yesterday, there was a package wrapped in gold paper on our front porch addressed, 'To Meredith' in an unfamiliar hand. Meredith opened it. Inside was a book by Mr. Rogers called, 'When a Pet Dies.' Taped to the inside front cover was the letter we had written to God in its opened envelope. On the opposite page was the picture of Abbey & Meredith and this note:

Dear Meredith, 
Abbey arrived safely in heaven. Having the picture was a big help and I recognized her right away. 
Abbey isn't sick any more. Her spirit is here with me just like it stays in your heart. Abbey loved being your dog. Since we don't need our bodies in heaven, I don't have any pockets to keep your picture in so I am sending it back to you in this little book for you to keep and have something to remember Abbey by. 
Thank you for the beautiful letter and thank your mother for helping you write it and sending it to me. What a wonderful mother you have. I picked her especially for you.  I send my blessings every day and remember that I love you very much. By the way, I'm easy to find. I am wherever there is love.

Love, God 

Breaking Through (Part Deux)

This past weekend, I attended The Breakthrough Experience with Dr. John Demartini again.  It was my second experience with him, and an even more profound one than the first.

The first time I attended the seminar, I was overwhelmed.  There was so much fascinating information and the curiosity of how it would all end dominated my thoughts.  I learned a lot, I experienced something completely "God-like" at the end as he guaranteed, and most importantly I gained some clarity of where I wanted my life to go.  Once the seminar was over, I diligently worked with the workbook on my own and did every exercise after every chapter of his book also called The Breakthrough Experience.  I could see that things were already working for me, things were on my way, not in my way.  I lost the touch on using the Demartini Method, but I understood my highest priorities in life and made sure that the goals I set every day for myself were congruent to these priorities.

Then, I attended the Breakthrough Experience again.  I cannot emphasize how truly grateful I am for the experience.  It deepened and rooted my certainty of the path I am on.  It revitalized my awareness to congruency and synchronicities.  Once again I experienced the mystical experience at the end and the feeling of my heart exploding with love.  How does it get any better?

John Demartini has made an impact on my life in the most profound way.  Through his teachings, I have learned that I am worthy of everything the Universe has to offer me.  I emphasize EVERYTHING.  The good with the bad, the happy with the sad, the positive with the negative, the infatuations with the resentments.. It is all there for a purpose and with some Demartini Method collapsing, it doesn't take long for me to see the connection, the order of the divine plan.. Pretty fantastic.

Next month, I'm off to Houston to participate in his training program and become able to provide the same type of assistance to anyone who carries "baggage" in any of the 7 areas of life.. Spiritual, mental, vocational, financial, familial, social and physical.  I am looking forward to a week of learning some good tools and putting them to practice to help the world!

Invictus

Invictus

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

William Ernest Henley

I am the master of my fate:

I am the captain of my soul............. No matter how defeated we perceive ourselves to be, we are invictus.  We are beacons of light with a much bigger purpose than we give ourselves credit for.  

You Are There

Amidst all the confusion

I'm reluctant to move forward

and find out it is all an illusion

you are there

There are times I have to decide

enveloped in self doubt 

I realize there is no wrong or right

you are there

Rain or shine,

happy or sad,

dead or alive,

you are there

In a breath, a thought, an action,

a dream, a butterfly, a cloud,

a touch, a hug, my daughter's affection,

you are there

I am grateful for your lessons,

humbled by your presence,

touched by your love,

and hopeful for .... everything.

You are there.

Happy Fourth of July from Oprah Winfrey

Ever since Oprah's finale, she has been sending mass emails to those who did email her at oprah@oprah.com.  I was one of those people and periodically I get messages from her.   I pretend they are only written to me.  It makes me feel special ;).  This is the latest.  It brought tears to my eyes.  God bless her.  

***************************

Hello Friends of Summer

I'm So happy to be back in the USA.

Spent a week with my girls in S.A..

They were all stressed for tests, but doing fine. No major crisis this trip. 

I love being with them and talking to them about all things important.

When I 'm there I'm talking from the time I get up til I go to bed, about EVERYTHING teenage girls are going through. It's the same all over the world.

I'm going back this fall to teach a class; calling it Life 101.

All the stuff I wish someone had told me about how the world works.

Should be fun since I love to teach. And they're like sponges.

Like 12th graders everywhere this first class is both anxious and excited about going to college.

Most will be the first in their family. So it's a very big deal for them, and they're feeling the pressure. 

Nothing like going out of country to have an even deeper appreciation for our own U.S.A. The Freedom to have options, something we often take for granted, is the most striking to me.

When Chris Rock was last on the show he said, "real wealth is having options". I thought that was pretty profound.

I now stress to my girls that education prepares you to have options. Without it you have none. 

Just took a walk around the neighborhood watching sprinklers on the back lawn. (I love sprinklers) Made me think about the red dirt road I traveled from Mississippi (no sprinklers) to the here and now.

And how that journey could have only been possible in the U.S.A. 

I know the 4th of July has turned into picnics and fireworks, and barbecue moments. But it's worthy of a pause, to think about what it really means to have Freedom. 

And while we're pausing think about those who sacrifice to make it so. 

Wishing you all a Peaceful and Happy 4th of July.

Oprah

The Voice Within - Snippet Video

My hardships served as lessons.  The biggest lesson of all was to learn to follow the voice of my heart and trust it with all I have.  It's the voice of truth, the voice of my authentic self.  Subscribe to my email list today and you can find out how to tap into your own wise, guiding voice.

Time Waits For No One.. Treasure Every Moment

I stole this from my friend Brandi's facebook profile.  Apparently, it has been around for a while, but I had never seen it and thought it was absolutely AMAZING!!

To realize

The value of a  sister/brother

Ask  someone

Who doesn't have one.

To  realize

The value of ten  years:

Ask a  newly

Divorced couple.

To  realize

The value of  four years:

Ask a  graduate.

To  realize

The value of one  year:

Ask a student  who

Has failed a  final exam

To  realize

The value of  nine months:

Ask a mother who  gave birth to a  stillborn.

To  realize

The value of one  month:

Ask a  mother

Who has given  birth to

A premature  baby.

To  realize

The value of one  week:

Ask an editor of  a weekly  newspaper.

To  realize

The value of one  minute:

Ask a  person

Who has missed  the train, bus or  plane..

To  realize

The value of  one-second:

Ask a  person

Who has survived an  accident.

Time waits for  no one.

Treasure every  moment you have.

You will  treasure it even more  when

You can share it  with someone  special.

To realize the  value of a friend or family  member:

LOSE  ONE.

Breaking Through...

About 2 weeks ago, I attended a life changing seminar.  It was given by Dr. John Demartini, and it was called The Breakthrough Experience.  I had no idea who Dr. Demartini was up until 3 days prior to the seminar.  My friend, Carla, told me about him being in town and speaking at various locations, she saw him speak on a Tuesday, and I went to see him on Thursday.  At the end of the evening, he spoke about his upcoming seminar, a 2 day event that took place at the Hyatt Regency in Coral Gables.  Awed by his knowledge, certainty and charisma, I signed up.  Little did I know that the 2 day seminar would have such an impact on me.

That following Saturday, the seminar was set to start at 8 am promptly.  Of course, I was fashionably late.  I soon realized that he was in Miami, so he expected a couple of us to be late... As we filled up the room, and the empty seats behind the tables that were ligned up in a U around him, Dr. Demartini jumped right into business.  That man can talk.  He can teach.  Saturday ended at 2 am Sunday morning.  The first half of the day, all theories, which while you are learning them, you feel confused as heck.  The second half is the application of everything he teaches and as promised the end result is purely MYSTICAL. 

Sunday began at around 10 am and it ended at 8 pm.  Another day full of insightful experiences and unloading of emotional baggage.  I learned things related to physics, metaphysics, philosophy, theology, mathematics that I truly believe I would not have learned anywhere else.  The experience I had was incredible.  I felt changes in myself right away, in many levels, mentally, emotionally, physically, physiologically and spiritually.  The best part of it all is that I continue to use what I learned every single day.  I am re-reading the workbook that was given to us and also his book with the same title The Breakthrough Experience.  So much to learn and so effective.

I, probably, sound like an infomercial for Dr. Demartini, but I have never been inspired as I have been by this man.  He has a purpose and he fulfills his purpose everyday, and his life is his own testimonial that we can achieve anything we truly are passionate about.  I felt that sharing this was worth a blog.  His work is worth a blog.  Hope his knowledge can inspire many of you, my readers, as it has inspired me.

2010 In a Flash...

It's been for ever since I've written anything.  Not a great thing for someone who is trying to finish a book, start a new one, and get some articles out to a couple of magazines.. However, the reason for my lack of writing compensates it all - my daughter.

2010 started out rough.  I, actually, re-learned the art of living one second at a time and took a journey inward to escape every-day small stuff that would normally irritate me or make me feel as if I was making no progress at all.  As the months crept up on me,  the clouds started clearing and the silver lining became ever so evident.  Inside, my heart sighed deeply, in its ever-knowing wisdom, it was relieved.  I had survived yet another test prior to 2009's end, and although it wasn't evident to me at the time, 2010 was looking very bright.

The details throughout the year are beyond the scope of this blog, which I'm writing because I feel compelled to explain my absence in the blog world, but there is a perfect explanation for all that's happened and "not-happened".

2010 has been a tremendous year in many ways.  I'm ending it in a way I never even imagined - as a mother.  What a feeling!  I've been blessed beyond words, and I know all the readers who are mothers themselves will relate to this "feeling".  I'm grateful for my life and I now see the reason behind all that has happened prior to this moment.. And, it is only the beginning.

I'm eager to start 2011 with hope that I continue to be on the same path 2010 started me on.. I aspire to continue my journey of being the best human-being I can possibly be and at the same time an extraordinary example to my daughter.. I hope to continue to learn from all the gifted souls that have crossed my path unexpectedly this year but with so much impact that every time I think of them, my heart skips a beat.  Exquisite experiences they have brought in my life.

Happy New Year to all my readers and everyone, in my virtual world, who by a message, a poke, a comment or a like have encouraged me to continue writing, and to those in my "real" world, whose words, touches, phone calls, shared tears and laughter remind me that being human is a privilege and not a right.  I learn everyday from all of you and you help me reach my goal every day, one breath at a time.  I deeply love you all.

Many blessings to all of you from me and my little girl..

Being & Doing

I admit that I have lost the practice of multi-tasking.  For thirty years, my life was a big juggle.  Within that big juggle, there were other mini-juggles.  Every situation I found myself in involved an enormous amount of multi-tasking, that, with time, became natural... Robotically natural.  Do, do, do... I was always doing something to accomplish something, to be somewhere, to impress/avoid someone... I was always busy doing, because I was afraid of just being.

Fortunately, I see that now.  As events unfolded in my life and allowed me to have loooong periods of self-reflection, I, reluctantly, admitted that I had ceased to be, I had become a do-er.  I truly felt that the Earth would not make its way around the Sun if I weren't doing something in my own life (how presumptuous!). 

Yesterday, I had one of the biggest realizations of my life.. I've let go.  I struggled at first.. Letting go is not easy.  Not-knowing is not easy.  The great paradox of it all is that the more I have surrendered to the unknowing-ness and allowed myself to "let go and let God", things LITERALLY have been handed to me or been placed on my lap effortlessly. 

One thing is to read about the theory of letting go and trust that it will all fall into place, and another is the act of giving your trust wholeheartedly to the Universe and be certain that the road never traveled is the only road to travel... I haven't multi-tasked in, well, a long time... The great thing is I don't miss it.  I enjoy my momentous focus.. One breath at a time.. I follow my intuition to what feels right and act upon that calling.. I'm no longer an unfocused, multi-tasking do-er.  I know with certainty that just by being, things will get worked out.. The Earth will not stop its solar rotation (Pheew!).

The discernment between being and doing is the key... There's a time to be and a time to do... Although, I strive to get to a point where just being is enough doing.

Like A Hummingbird....

Ever since I can remember, I always wished God would give me wings.  I recall praying at night as a little girl and ending each prayer with "God, please, don't forget my wings." 

I love to fly.  I wish I could literally fly. 

Perhaps, it is the sense of freedom flying implies that attracts me so much.  Maybe, it's my rebel nature in love with the opportunity to defy gravity.  I think, however, what attracts me most to the idea of being able to fly is the fact that I'd be able to see the world from up above.  I'd be able to remind myself, whenever I wished, how small we really are and how truly beautiful the Earth is.  Nevertheless, all three reasons still draw me to the idea that humans should have wings.  I'm not sure how many of us would appreciate them, but I know I would, I would fly to all corners of the world and when I got tired, I'd come back to Earth to rest, eager to fly some more. 

For a little while now, I've been thinking of getting a tattoo.  I'm still not sure that I will, but I'm thinking about it.  I have thought of a butterfly, I've thought of Sanskrit sayings, I've tried to figure out what would represent me in many ways...

Recently, I asked my friend Lily to paint me a picture.  She's an incredible artist and I'm extremely attracted to her style.  She's gifted beyond words, and I asked her to surprise me.  She did.  I don't have the painting yet (she's not done), but she told me she was painting me a hummingbird.  I didn't know how to feel about it, because I've seen her other paintings and I wasn't sure if I wanted the picture of a hummingbird in my house.  I asked her what the meaning behind it was, and she explained, "Remember I told you that the hummingbird is the only bird that has legs but cannot walk, it flies all the time and stops to rest. They are so beautiful and graceful too. Think of the hummingbird like your creativity/mind, allowing you to do everything you want to do even though you cannot walk."

There was my answer.  If I decide to go through with the tattoo, that is what I will get.  A hummingbird, "the flower-kissers" of the skies.  God, finally, answered my childhood prayer.  Because of my friend Lily, I, now, have wings.  I'm like a hummingbird. 

My First Blog Award

Today I was awarded my first blog award by my very special friend, Nancy. She awarded me The Inspiration Award... So, this blog is devoted to thank her.

I thank you, my friend. You, in small subtle ways, have made a huge difference in my life. Simply, by just believing in me and accepting me, you have helped me believe and accept myself. Thank you for seeing me the way you do. I am my own worst critic, and it grounds me to know that by simply doing what I have to do to get by everyday, I inspire you.

Because of your award and a conversation with someone else earlier this morning, I realized that I am exactly where and whom I am supposed to be. I have decided to dedicate my life helping others achieve their highest potentials, because nothing is impossible. How will I do that? I don't really know. I do know that it will come to me, just like everything else has made its way to me my whole life. I think I have finally accepted the final challenge. This is it. It is what it is.

This award encourages me to keep writing and spilling my guts about me and my everyday life. If I can inspire you by just being me, then, I feel extremely accomplished and very humbled to have touched you.

You rock, soul-sista!

His Holiness The Dalai Lama - II

I don't even know where to start. Seeing The Dalai Lama was one of the most humbling experiences of my life. He is a well of wisdom and humility. The audience hung on to his every word and although at times he had difficulty expressing himself in English, his personal assistant would help him, and the message never changed, love. Unfortunately, I was only able to attend the morning show, which was on Global Responsibility.

His approach to life is simple. We are all the same. The moment we look within and hang on to our basic moral values, we will learn to love ourselves first and love our brothers and sisters - the rest of humanity. Hearing the Dalai Lama speak was refreshing. His eternal patience with our western culture and his profound knowledge of the human spirit shone right through his aura. He humbly got on stage, sat on his chair, took off his flip flops, crossed his legs and waited until all the formal introductions were over, before he filled our hearts and minds with his experiences and taught us that love and respect have no boundaries.

At the time of the Q & A's, he put on his little red visor and answered each question thoroughly. The first question was "Who do you admire?" His answer touched me and my friend deeply, because of its simplicity and truth. He said "I admire my mother. She taught me to be kind, because that is what her face always showed, kindness."

Until Tuesday, I never defined myself as anything religious. Although, I am constantly searching for spirituality and trying to live my life by the laws of unconditional love, if I had to choose a philosophy to live by, it would most definitely be Buddhism. Its way of living rings true in my heart. And, after hearing the Dalai Lama, even more so.

Thank you so much, Nancy, for thinking of me when you got your tickets. I am honored that you gave me that opportunity and forever grateful. It was an unforgettable experience!

A Love Story...

This is a must-watch video. I saw this a couple of weeks ago, and it touched me deeply. Simply beautiful!!