Time Flies

ANASTASIA IN A FOSTER HOME

it's only been nine months since you came into my life.  i never knew i could love so deeply, carelessly and wholeheartedly before i met you.  when i first saw your face, my heart experienced emotions i never knew existed.  a tiny little being, inside a baby carrier, with an air of indifference you looked at me, "who is this lady?" you must have thought, having been bounced around in foster homes before daddy, finally won the fight to get you.  the moment our eyes met, time froze.  it was only you and me at the arrivals area of fort lauderdale airport.  i ceased to pay attention to other passengers who hurriedly passed us by, clueless of how important, beautiful and spiritual that experience really was.  i was meeting my daughter, and you were meeting your mommy.  

FIRST DAY HOME

BABY SHOWER TO WELCOME TASI HOME

before meeting you, i wondered if i was capable of loving you.  i wondered if we would get along and get used to each other.  i wondered how i would answer your questions about your biological mom, how you came to be, and how you ended up with me.  i wondered how you would react while i told you the truth about everything.  as i saw you coming down the escalators with your father, my doubts dissipated.  no doubt i would love you unconditionally.  the indifference in your little baby eyes hid a longing for a steady, secure, loving home.  a place for YOU to call home.  a home where you would grow up with people who would be around for a long remainder of your life. when i saw you, i felt it.  i felt you relieved to have found me.  i was elated and extremely fortunate to have found you.  

HER CONTAGIOUS LAUGHTER

THIS FACE IS SO LOVABLE!

so many sleepless nights, worried days, countless smiles and grateful tears.  you have changed my life as you have changed these past 9 months.  you have grown and continue to grow into a beautiful little girl, and along with you, my life follows the same path.  it grows deeper, with more meaning and direction.  you inspire me with your determination to live and your strength. you inspire me to be the best ME i can be.  you inspire me to inspire you to be the best you that you can be.  somehow, however, i already know that i will love you for all that you will be, as i love you for all that you already are.  you are the star in my darkest nights and the sunshine in my brightest days.  no breath is taken without you in my mind, no move is made without you in my heart.  you are as much a part of me as the blood that flows through my veins.  

MOMMY'S LITTLE FLOWER 

UNCONDITIONALLY LOVED

i love you, my daughter; don't ever forget it.  you deserve your dreams, and make sure you always go after them.  i will teach you the best that i can from all that i have learned, and i hope you can learn a little from every one you come across along the way.  love with no fear, live with no boundaries and remain open to the infinite possibilities that the universe will offer you.. 

happy 1st birthday, baby girl.

DURING HER 1ST BDAY PARTY

ENJOYING HER PARTY GUESTS

MY HEART SITTING ON MY LAP

(it's a little late, but looking over some of the photos brought up these feelings again)