Vacation

Vacation is good for the mind.  It's good for the body and it is definitely good for the soul.

I've been on vacation for 20 days.  When I say I've been on vacation, I mean it literally.  I have not done one thing that remotely reminds me of my daily routine when I'm home... even writing.  I made a conscious choice to really experience this past 20 days without the need to interpret, report or analyze anything.  Now that it's coming to an end, I'm allowing my left brain do some work and hence the birth of this blog...

Three years ago, when I left Brazil after spending one year here post my tracheal operation, the feelings of returning back home (Florida) were overwhelming.  Brazil is not accessible to wheelchairs and although, my life was saved here (in a way), I felt resentful that my birth country, a place I always returned to when I needed some soul-recharge, was not welcoming to my new needs...  Being here again, almost five years after my accident, has completely changed the perception I left with three years ago.  There have been some changes to the city in attempts to make it more accessible, however difficulties still exist.  What has changed tremendously, though, is the way I see it.

While planning the trip, I knew it would be meaningful in many ways, because it would obsolete the ghosts from the past that had haunted me for the past three years as far as my ability to move within Brazil... I was right.  I admit it is tiring and it takes much more effort to get around, especially when I've been spoiled with the "ease" of my life back home.  Nevertheless, every effort and extra-energy spent here trying to get around or simply to the hair salon at the end of the block is well worth it.  It frees me from my own self-imposed limitations and it helps me practice the art of asking for help and accepting it.  The best part is that I get to spend time with my ever supporting-loving family.

As the end approaches, my little brain has started processing every single bit of experience I had here and is trying to organize the bits of information... My heart, on the other hand, seems to have grasped every experience and its meaning the moment they happened and it silently smirks at my attempts to "analyze" these experiences... Some things are indescribable, especially feelings.  At a later date, I think I'll have a clearer, more serene, better articulated version of this blog to explain and describe all the wonderful moments and incredible people I have been blessed to come across thus far....